@appledog Thanks for sharing your situation. Now, I have different thoughts for you.
Appledog wrote:My teacher taught me one of the moves from Hunyuan qigong...he gave me a type of intention to think of during the exercise, breathe in through this point, fire shoots out from that point, etc. -- So, two weeks later I ask him a question about the move and he says I am doing it completely wrong and teaches me another way. he said he never taught me the first way.
Your situation reminded me of several stories and experiences. I'll only tell one that may help. I will put a big, IIRC disclaimer in front of it. The gist is correct some of the details and exact wordings may be off a bit. I have not told this story for a couple of decades.
Chen Zhonghua went to Jinan for university. When he got there, he made inquiries after martial arts in the city. Several people suggested that he check out "The old man in the park that no one can beat." The day he arrived, there happened to be a Japanese delegation visiting. They were searching out students of Chen Fake to ascertain the condition of Chen Taijiquan in China. They were interviewing, quizzing, and getting demonstrations from Hong Junsheng. It meant for Zhonghua was that he had to wait until they left to talk to Master Hong.
When the delegation left, Zhonghua ran after and caught up to Master Hong. He asked, "Can you teach me?" Hong said, "I cannot teach you anything. The question is whether or not you can learn." Master Hong had been classically trained as a scholar, so he had specific notions about education that modern people find difficult to understand. "May I study with your class?" Zhonghua asked. "I can't keep you from doing whatever you want to do." replied Hong. Hong then told him what time class started but said that people arrive early.
The next morning, Zhonghua arrived early. Hong took him to a nearby corner of the park and showed him what Zhonghua would learn later was the positive circle. "Do this," said Hong. So everyday Zhonghua would come to his little corner and practice the positive circle for the two hours of the class and if some lingered longer until the teacher left.
After seven months...
Hong approached Zhonghua one morning. "You, stupid boy! Why do you come here and do this thing every morning? Why don't you go do something else? What are you doing anyway?" To which Zhonghua replied demonstrating, "I'm doing the exercise you told me to do." Hong retorted, "I never told you to do that!" After looking at him a minute, Hong said, "Maybe you have enough intelligence to do this," and showed him the negative circle.
After five more months...
Hong walked over to Zhonghua and said, "You have to be the stupidest boy I have ever met. It's clear you cannot learn anything from me. Go over there with those people," pointing to the class, "and see if you can learn something from them."
I had assumed that Chen Zhonghua had become proficient in the circles in the year he practiced. But with one telling, a student asked if he had mastered the circles during that time. Chen Zhonghua chuckled and said, "Mastered? No. Become proficient? Probably not. Laid a foundation? Yes. Trained my mind and body to practice diligently? Yes. The main thing practicing circles for a year got me was entry to the class, to corrections, to push-hands partners, to feeling the movements in other people, to direct instruction from Hong and his senior students."
Many of the practices of a classical Chinese (Confucian) education may seen odd to us. We are used to positive feedback. When we encounter negative feedback, we are often taken aback and confused. However, any kind of feedback is usually a sign that you are making progress. Remember also that negative feedback can reinforce behavior as strongly as positive.
Appledog wrote:My problem is easy enough to understand, I don't think it is my teachers, it is just me. My teacher told me, 'you must do this movement 10,000 times before you will understand it' so, that has been my goal. The problem is I only did it 5,000 times. Sure, I got some results, but looking back I surely cannot blame anyone but myself. I am sure I will feel better in another six months of training.
As a learner I am always interested in learning new stuff....F
The one fear, perhaps irrational fear I have, is that I am doing one little thing wrong which will spoil everything. ....
There's a Chinese adage, "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear."
Note that it does not say, "When the student is ready, the art he wants to study will become available to him."
One thing you can do to get yourself ready is to go through @Quigga's fairly exhaustive list of goals.
So what is the goal of one's training?
1) get better at fighting - competitions, types of sparring, 'on the streets cliche', bouncing / security, military drills that result in better weapon handling and mobility
2) increased health and well being - feeling more vital and clear headed, balanced emotions, healing from trauma, getting sick less often, helping with lifestyle changes aka abstaining from drugs, feeling more ready to take on life and it's challenges, sense of ease and not constant struggle, increase in love and building healthy relationships that pour back into you, increased stability
3) get more wisdom - what's the place of a single human on this Earth, reflecting one's attitude and stance on all things, cultivation of humility respect and love, being able to discern right from wrong action, get insight into why the world and the existence on it is the way it is, continuously growing as a person, reducing personal biases to best of one's ability, how to live a peaceful prosperous life without getting into mischief
4) esoteric / psychic abilities - knowledge about their wise and proper usage so as not to harm yourself and others, satisfying one's curiosity, discerning the reasons why one would certain skills in the first place
5) being better equipped for one's own journey of growth and personal development in all aspects
So if you want to know if you have a good teacher, you need some kind of metrics to measure your progress. Else you might end up chasing dragons and wasting a lot of time and effort. Not in a way that your Kung Fu will suck, but just in general.
Choose a primary and a couple of secondary destinations. If you don't know where you are going, how will you know when you get there much less if something will take you there?
One of my Wutan teachers compared each martial art to a building. Some buildings are taller with higher levels that other buildings. He said, a lot of people waste time running up a story or two in one building, then running down and running to another building running up a story or two in that building and so on. They never learn that even if they are in a fairly low building, when one gets close to the top, there are bridges to neighboring buildings. If you stick with one art and let it take you as far as it can, there will soften be a transfer point to another art or branch that will take you further.
When I met Chen Zhonghua, I could have cared less about what lineage, or even what art he was practicing, or any of that peripheral stuff. He had a skill set that would help me move toward my destination, and he was willing and able to teach me. Had he told me he was teaching something call tiddlywink boxing, I would have been all in.
EDIT: [ I should add when I met Chen Zhonghua I had been practicing Taijiquan and other Chinese martial arts for over 13 years. I was confident in what I had learned. I was pretty good in push hands competition. I had even judged at some regional competitions.
In one evening, I realized that all I had learned previously was as a single drop compared to an ocean that had opened up to me. Chen Zhonghua was able to connect with my mind and body in ways that I had not experienced with other teachers. What I learned resonated with me, so I improved over the course of a single weekend. He had three students with him. Each of whom was outstanding and generous with all they had learned. They all had mad skills. I was not even in their league in form or push hands.
But, I say this not about my decision. When looking at a teacher, his or her knowledge and skills are important. The ability to teach and convey information and skills are also important. I think it is also key to see what kind of students he or she attracts. What have they learned and what skills have they developed? Are those this aligned with your destinations?]
So, if you trust your teacher, then trust your teacher. If you don't trust your teacher, why are you studying with them? Although, I would like to hear how a student of He Binquan came to reside in Taiwan.