Chris:
Avoid sneezing.
Otherwise, rest and visit a sauna, if ye have such sophisticated things in deepest Gloucestershire. There, ye can jump from hot steam to cold bath and back again, all the while frantically massaging the groin. Be sure not to give anyone the wrong impression while you are under the water, though.
Hassler:
SNIP
learn to let the bones do more of the work instead of muscles
SNIP
Sound advice as regards the "what." Care to impart some advice on the "how?"



It's a conspiracy I tellz ya!!!11!!11!! 
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