buddhist joke

[neijia_boxer]

Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication.

[Dmitri]

That's almost as bad as some of them creamsicle stick jokes...

[Bill]

Chao-chou: “I am nothing but a donkey.”

Wen-yuan:“A donkey? You’re SO lucky. I am merely a donkey’s buttocks.”

Chao-chou: “Actually, I dream that I could one day be a donkey’s buttocks. At the moment, I am what comes out of the donkey’s buttocks.”

Wen-yuan: “You’re privileged. I’d give anything to be what comes out of donkey’s buttocks. For I am but a worm living in what comes out of a donkey’s buttocks. And do you know why I’m there?”

Chao-chou: “Why?”

Wen-yuan: “Because I wanted to go somewhere special for my summer holidays.”

[Bill]

A student is on one side of a raging river.
There are no bridges. He has no boat.
He shouts out to the master on the opposite bank. “How do I get to the other side?”
The master shouts back: “You are on the other side.”

[Bill]

Q: Why can't a Buddhist vacuum under the sofa?

A: Because he has no attachments.”

[Darth Rock&Roll]

this:

A student is on one side of a raging river.
There are no bridges. He has no boat.
He shouts out to the master on the opposite bank. “How do I get to the other side?”
The master shouts back: “You are on the other side.”

is about as zen as it gets.

[Bill]

[Bill]

“Things are not what they seem; nor are they otherwise.”

[Bill]

An arhat monk(who has already attained nirvana) was invited to lunch by a villager. They were walking to the villagers house. At one point, there were some cow droppings on the road, just in front of the monk. The monk jumped over it and continued walking.

"This monk is not disciplined at all, I wasted money to prepare such good food for him" thought the villager. "May be I can keep the dessert to eat by myself."

A few minutes later, there was another load of cow dung. This time, the priest carefully and slowly walked around the droppings.

"Why are you so inconsistent?" retorted the villager.

"The previous jump cost me a good dessert. I did not want to risk losing the main dish, too!"

[GrahamB]

Who woke Bill up?

[bartekb]

How to kill a Buddhist? Tell him to jump from his Ego to his IQ:)
How many buddhists to scew a lightbulb? One to change the lightbulb, one NOT to change the lightbulb, and one to neither change nor not changethe lightbulb, I can not find any lightbulb.

[Bill]

I've always enjoyed buddhist humor.

[Bill]

What did the buddhist say to the cow?

Mu

[Wuyizidi]

Two monks sitting in zazen, one says to the other "are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?"

[Interloper]

Did you hear the one about the Buddhist monk who asked the hotdog vendor to "Make me one with everything"?
[GONNNNNNG!]
So, the Buddhist monk pays the hotdog vendor for his $3 hotdog with a $10 bill. When the vendor pockets the bill, the monk asks, "Hey -- where's my change?"
The hotdog vendor replies, "Change comes from within."
[GONNNNNG!]