The Book of Eli

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The Book of Eli

Postby KEND on Sat Jan 30, 2010 8:22 am

A post apocalyptic saga, The Road warrior meets LOTR meets Journey to the East, where, instead of a ring the MacGuffin is the good book. I am not particularly religious and am not enamored of the Bible so I see the movie as a testament to the human spirit rather than a Pilgrims progress for theNew Age Christian. Superb performance by Denzel who goes from strength to strength, Gary Oldman again as the quintessential villain, Mila Kunis is more than adequate as the female sidekick, minor roles by Michael Gambon[arguably one of the greatest actors of his generation] and Malcom McDowell [Clockwork Orange]. Fight scenes[which were excellent], choreographed by Danny Innosanto.
Well directed, a feeling of desolation pervades like an Antonioni landscape.
A fine movie.
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Re: The Book of Eli

Postby Michael on Sat Jan 30, 2010 11:20 am

Let me just say this film sucks, but if you think Avatar is good, maybe your icepick lobotomy will also let you enjoy Eli. 'Nuff said.

"Post apocalyptic saga"? Saga? How about post-apocalyptic pussy fart.

Almost all American movies totally bite these days.
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Re: The Book of Eli

Postby Josealb on Sat Jan 30, 2010 12:41 pm

Ha! two opposite reviews...hmmm...who's taste do i trust more?

Im definitely watching it. ;D
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Re: The Book of Eli

Postby KEND on Sat Jan 30, 2010 12:42 pm

Thank you for your comments, I would have preferred a little more in depth analysis but since your main comment on Avatar was the size of the alien's mammaries I'll have to settle for less.I havent seen Avatar yet but suspect I will be a little underwhelmed, a movie whose special effects is the main attraction probably will be of little interest to me. I would be interested in what you consider masterpieces of film making over the last decade to at least establish a base line.
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Re: The Book of Eli

Postby meeks on Sat Jan 30, 2010 2:17 pm

I would be interested in what you consider masterpieces of film making over the last decade to at least establish a base line.


battlefield earth hands down
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Re: The Book of Eli

Postby GrahamB on Sat Jan 30, 2010 4:21 pm

meeks wrote:
I would be interested in what you consider masterpieces of film making over the last decade to at least establish a base line.


battlefield earth hands down


Yeah, and that one with Madonna in by Guy Ritchie.
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Re: The Book of Eli

Postby qiphlow on Sat Jan 30, 2010 4:46 pm

dudes,are you kidding? this one is by far the cinematic epic of several generations:

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Re: The Book of Eli

Postby shawnsegler on Sat Jan 30, 2010 5:42 pm

I'm telling you guys....rent a copy of "Murder Party". You'll be glad you did.

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Re: The Book of Eli

Postby Craig on Sun Jan 31, 2010 6:39 pm

haha michael you hate every movie tho. (movies that i have never heard of dont dont count as movies btw :P)

edit: dammit, just looked it up. book of eli isnt out here until march. internets will prevail
Last edited by Craig on Sun Jan 31, 2010 6:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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SPOILER ALERT!

Postby Michael on Sun Jan 31, 2010 10:01 pm

KEND wrote:Thank you for your comments, I would have preferred a little more in depth analysis but since your main comment on Avatar was the size of the alien's mammaries I'll have to settle for less.I havent seen Avatar yet but suspect I will be a little underwhelmed, a movie whose special effects is the main attraction probably will be of little interest to me. I would be interested in what you consider masterpieces of film making over the last decade to at least establish a base line.

Off the top of my head, one good movie from the last decade is "Children of Men" (2006). Instead of individual movies, how about principles involved in the movies, such as honesty, originality, and creativity? Not every film will be a masterpiece, but Eli completely fails to hold up to analysis while the film is rolling. Thinking about how ridiculous it is afterward is just masochistic, but...


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There is very little in the film that is consistent or makes much sense, and certainly there is not a single thing that is not predictable even while fully sedated. The blindness gag is a feckkin' hoot and a half. Can a blind man shoot a cat or a flying bird with a bow and arrow? Give me a break. Who threw the conveniently available sacred book-sized bomb from the second floor and then rushed back downstairs instead of staying in the higher ground? Who is stupid enough to roll up on a house at close range containing a man who already single-handedly outgunned at least 10 guys, and yet sacrifice as many men as possible without unveiling your greatest firepower advantage? Why did the bullets bounce off Eli in fire fight #1 but wound him mortally in fire fight #2? How in the hell can you walk west for 30 years and not get to California? Because you're blind, but obviously that's impossible, so. The road crew savages had guns when Eli first saw them murder and rape (even though he's blind he knew what happened from afar), but when it came time to kill him in the Orpheus bar, they all decided it would be more honorable to get hacked to death instead of just shooting his ass. Why didn't Eli take the arrows from the bodies of the two men who tried to rape the stupid girl? How the hell could a girl who knows nothing be able to drive a car? There wasn't a single moment in the film that didn't show how little sense anything made. Why would a blind man open the door to a car with a corpse and not "feel around" or look around, or whatever blind men who aren't blind are supposed to do? How could you possibly have a working chainsaw, but no water? How could a blind man expertly aim and shoot a handgun at moving targets 10-20 meters away? How can you not, Glasshopper?

But most importantly, who the hell cares about a post-apocalyptic saga so devoid of any originality or creative energy of its own that it steals shots from a host of other movies: Mad Max, Escape from New York, Children of Men, Malcolm X, etc. All of this to transport a bible to Alcatraz for the future of humanity? We need to invent a new word that means insipid, clichéd, trite, predictable, and painfully boring. Perhaps one word is not available, but "The Book of Eli" certainly does the trick.

For anyone who likes this film, please post your review of "Legion". I just want to see your typing skillz. Is every English-speaking film in the theaters today as bad as these? Do people still want interesting stories? I guess not.
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Re: The Book of Eli

Postby D_Glenn on Sun Jan 31, 2010 10:18 pm

Micheal, you should check out "the Road" for post-apocalyptic accuracy.


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Re: The Book of Eli

Postby Josealb on Mon Feb 01, 2010 6:14 am

The Road is a very good movie.

Michael, not everything has to be a masterpiece. Some things are just meant to look good without making you think much.
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Re: The Book of Eli

Postby GrahamB on Mon Feb 01, 2010 7:46 am

Josealb wrote:The Road is a very good movie.

Michael, not everything has to be a masterpiece. Some things are just meant to look good without making you think much.


That's exactly what annoys me about much of the Avatar criticism.

I was just trying to think what my favourite movie was of the last 10 years, and all I can remember is Rachel Getting Married. It's a mental-fuck-you-up disguised as a "chick flick", which makes it worse, because when it hits you in the guts you aren't ready. Forget horror movies - if you want to be thoroughly psychologically messed up go and see that. That and Old Boy. ;D
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Re: The Book of Eli

Postby Darth Rock&Roll on Mon Feb 01, 2010 8:13 am

well, denzel makes some pretty shitty movies overall when it comes down to it.

limited appeal.
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Re: The Book of Eli

Postby Michael on Mon Feb 01, 2010 9:42 am

The whole reason I saw Eli, besides being kind of bored and missing the enjoyment of going to the cineman, was that I really like Denzel, Oldman, and Gambon, who are all great actors.

Thanks for the tip on "The Road", I'll check it out, and if it sucks, I will scream.

Eli also did a take-off from "The Professional". It was obvious and with Oldman just like in the original, so not a ripoff, but that's all Eli had going for it: continous redo's of famous shots from other movies.

producer #1: "Hey man, this script makes no sense."
producre #2:
"That's all right, we'll just continously redo shots from previous movies. That will give the critics something to whine about and the masses won't even notice."
producer #1: "Perfect."
Last edited by Michael on Mon Feb 01, 2010 9:45 am, edited 1 time in total.
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