The Economy: Jokes Only Please

[klonk]

The economy...it's worse than divorce. Iv'e lost half my net worth, and I still have my wife!

Pah-DUMPH

[Chris Fleming]

http://www.mustsharejokes.com/page/Joke ... omy?t=anon

[cerebus]

With an economy like this, who needs jokes?

[Michael]

The economy is a joke. Does that count?

[Tom]

Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke announced his willingness to serve another term, noting "Where else in this economy could I get another job?"

[adapted from Conan O'Brien's joke about Alan Greenspan]

[klonk]

Invest in ankle bracelets, says my broker.

Why?

They can't go any lower!

[cerebus]

Invest in ankle bracelets, says my broker.

Why?

They can't go any lower!

Toe rings....

[Darth Rock&Roll]

It's hard to be irrationally exuberant when you are homeless.

[Darth Rock&Roll]

Invest in ankle bracelets, says my broker.

Why?

They can't go any lower!

Toe rings....

sandal bottoms

[klonk]

I went downtown to ask for a loan.

The man said, why ask here? This is a gas station, we don't have money to lend right now. He said:

"Try the bakery."

[klonk]

Word For The Day:

Liquidity: That's when you look at your financial statement and pee in your pants.

[klonk]

It now appears that I will benefit from President Obama's stimulus plan to the tune of thirteen dollars a week. I call this

Chump Change You Can Believe In

[Michael]

You mean you don't want your country socialized for such a small amount of money? You'd sing a different tune if you was a Bank of America executive. If you don't want it, please forward to me so I can buy more rice and bananas for my porridge.

[klonk]

Of course I did what was in my power to head off this scenario from happening at all. As that was unavailing, what better do I have to do than crack jokes, and wonder about what can be done for 2010?

Jokes only, please!

[Michael]

It's no joke that $13 USD will buy a lot of rice and nanners in Guangzhou! But wait about a year, mebbe two, and I doubt it will buy much at all.