An Apology

[Appledog]

Hi guys! Based on what bhassler and a few others have said, I've decided to take a short break from the forums. Nothing so prosaic as quitting -- this is a valuable resource to me and I have come to respect many of you deeply. Unfortunately I have failed to express that and instead I have caused some trouble here and I am sorry for that, I apologize.

I think one of my many problems is simply that I live in self-imposed isolation. I don't have any real-life friends, and I haven't really spent time speaking with people in English outside of this forum, and perhaps watching Youtube. As a result, I feel I have lost the ability to relate to people or communicate properly in English. This, along with a stressful life has led me to a difficult place. I am not depressed but I do recognize there is a problem with me and there doesn't seem to be much I can do in the short term, but, for what it's worth I am trying to move back to my country and just live a normal life that way. Maybe the socialization will do me good?

I've been focused inwards for far too long, and maybe that has led me to express the stress and frustration in my life, and not the joy, in ways I did not realize I was doing. But please understand I did not mean to attack or offend anyone. Reviewing some of my older posts, I have seriously asked myself, what was I thinking? For too long I told myself, they just don't get the jokes, or they just don't understand what I am saying, or that it's their fault for having low morals, or I'm just trying to help, or to share my thoughts. But it seems what was really happening is that I fell out of touch with basic social graces in some way.

As my situation from that end is rather pathetic, please pity me and not hate me too much for what I have become. I will take some time off and try to get along in normal society for a while and see if that helps. I'll probably chime in from time to time, maybe moreso next summer once I can settle down a bit, until then, good luck and good health It's all good on my end, really, and I hope it is all good for you too

[Dmitri]

No idea what happened, but - great post, and best of luck; hope you feel better soon!

[GrahamB]

I don't know what happened either, but considering the person calling you out was bhassler, I wouldn't be that worried that you were in the wrong.

[everything]

what? didn't see any of that. as origami_itto said, you/we are a bunch of jerks, but i must've missed it in your case. don't think you come across that way.

[origami_itto]

Hey man I get it, take some time, come back with a good attitude. Let's make some community.

[Giles]

Not hate, nor pity either, but certainly respect for being so open and honest and for being prepared to engage in serious self-reflection.

Real-life friends; face-to-face, on-the-spot exchange and above all 'interchange' with fellow human beings, be they friends, training partners (not mutually exclusive, of course), family (if you have more or less healthy relationships with them) or other social contacts -- all so important. Recent studies have shown that the number 1 way to stay mentally healthy and agile as we get older, and to delay or simply stop the onset of dementia, is socially engaging live with other people! As well as full-body physical activity! Far more effective than any supposed 'brain fitness training' such as doing Sodoku or whatever. These things are what really get the neurons firing and networking, and are so much more rewarding and fun. So as you get yourself out of isolation, even if takes a little time, I wish you all the best for new people connections.