by origami_itto on Fri Oct 28, 2022 6:47 am
We can't help it in the moment, but we can tune ourselves to particular patterns.
Look at it like, a perfect human will naturally respond perfectly, naturally in harmony with Tao.
But we're flawed, we have these patterns that prevent us from easily accessing that flow.
You say "let go" but even that is a conditioned response, at least that's what 20 years of Taijiquan has taught me. With most of us, our natural inclination is to hold on.... tightly.
It's easy to just say "I am who I am" and behave reflexively. It's transcendent to start being aware of the negative response patterns. We call it growth and maturity, change, whatever. In some cases, sure, our reactions mellow based simply on changes to our hormones over our lifetime. I believe most of that positive change, at least for me, is a result of conscious effort to reprogram my immediate reponses.
A minor example is in the reflexive greetings.
When someone would ask me "How are you today?" I would say "Good, thanks."
But I don't like that, it's not grammatically pleasing or reflective of the person I actually am. So I've trained myself to say "I am well, thank you. How are you today?"
Small, minor example, but the key to everything. Language guides thought, thought sets patterns, behavior follows patterns.
You can take the same approach to ablist, sexist, racist microaggressions and slurs, negative self-talk, self-limiting beliefs and behaviors.
You most definitely CAN help who you are and what you do, but maybe it's less adding on than it is stripping away the bullshit.